DEFECTS OF CHARACTER

Hi again. This post was originally meant to be about how the 12-Step program that I'm following has its members, at some point in their first few months, write down their resentments and issues and defects of character and such and then admit them to themselves and another AA member.

I was going to poke good-natured fun at myself and complain jokingly about the clothes that I haven't folded after washing (even though it has been over three days) and the messy state of my apartment and my somewhat-troubling addiction to pornography and the euphoric brain chemicals that are the result of placing my mind and eyes firmly in the gutter....

But, before I could even stroke a single key--yes, I said "stroke"--I noticed that Britney Spears was bald. Wait; let me back up, there, and see if I typed what I had intended to type.

Please hold. --Eagles "Life in the Fast Lane," Muzak version--

Back. Yep. Oops-I-Did-It-Again (her Native American name) is going with the Curly look. (Actually, I think she copied off of me.) Bald. Bee-Aye-El-Dee. Bald. Did I mention the fact that that cute little vixen from seven years ago now has none of her blonde locks left? Rather, she has a cue ball for a head?

Now, listen, some people can pull the look off. I, for example, think that I make it look pretty decent. Men, in general, carry it off better than women. Women with darker complexions carry it off better than lighter-complected women. Lighter-complected women with sharp chins and sharp features carry it off better than lighter-complected women with doe eyes and a slightly-undercut chin. Dear Britney is in the latter group with regard to the Chrome Dome Continuum. Why did she do it? I have a couple of theories:

Theory Number One: She has lost her mind. Not having much of a brain with which to start, it was a relatively short descent. Perhaps the fame got to her. Perhaps she longs for K-Fed. Perhaps she has syphillis and has begun the Madness Phase of that oh-so unfortunate disease.

Theory Number Two: It is common knowledge that she has recently checked herself into a rehabilitation center. I fully support her; addiction can be a bitch. Following that thread, I purport that Britney has absolved herself of her tresses as a symbolic gesture. Fresh start. Everything is new. Thus, why not shave the head? That makes absolutely perfect sense to me. Then again, I'm slightly insane.

She was also in a tattoo parlor when her "shocking new 'do" was discovered by the gasping Publik. Maybe she was getting a fresh-start tat on her right butt cheek. Time will tell as the story plays out, is news and then becomes played out. Wow.

(I included a picture of my clothes, just for the hell of it. Eventually, I'll fold them. If I can get over the shock of seeing Brit-Brit Bald-Bald.)