Wednesday, July 11, 2007


I embraced my femininity today. I went shopping for shirts. I may have done it with a man's expediency, though. I was driving home from work and I passed the thrift store on Lincoln. I have always meant to stop in and see what they might have to offer. Today, I stopped.

I walked in the door. I did not need a dress. I did not need a pearl necklace. Nor did I need a swimming suit top. So I kept on walking, missing the sign above the doorway to the back room that read "Watch Your Step!" I had not been watching my step and so I missed a step--misstepped--and nearly stumbled against the doorjamb. To save face, I walked back through the doorway and made a point of looking up. And there, in bubbly green pastel letters, I saw the sign. I made a show of shaking my head--who the hell puts a sign to watch one's step above an average human being's sightline? and, if the person had been walking with his or her head held high, majestically, would they not have stumbled over the four-inch drop, anyway?--and I walked back into the Men's-slash-Toys section. I did not need a caterpillar on wheels, nor did I need Lincoln Logs. I wanted a shirt or three.

So I ambled to the button-up shirt rack and thumbed through the prospects. I was joined in the room by a woman in her early-50s. She thumbed through a tie rack. I don't know if she found what she was looking for. Frankly, I didn't care. I was on a mission. There were some god-awful manifestations of clothing but, then again, there were a few decent shirts, too. I grabbed three plaid button-up short-sleeved shirts and a gray polo-type shirt, and held them against my chest to approximate the likelihood of their fitting me. They all seemed like winners, so I stuffed them under an arm and grabbed a pair of shoes off the rack before heading to the check-out. Cost of four shirts and a pair of box-like shoes? Twenty-five dollars and some change. Total time in the store? About ten minutes. Correct fits? All. And? Yes, priceless.

Shopping is easy! And now I know where to go if I ever need a polyester shirt with a screaming floral pattern.


Melissa said...

Don't tell me you found those shoes there! Those are great, love them, and I think I just commented on them on your flickr site.

$25 and change? Well worth the trip up the step.

Drea said...

If they are anything like me they put that sign up high so people DO miss the step (mistep!!), then they can chuckle at other peoples misfortunes.... because watching people trip is hilarious!

Is that bad??

Yeah...those shoes are great, are they one of the purchases??

The One and Only A said...

Mel: They were indeed five doll-hairs. They're in pretty decent shape, too. I kind of had a fleeting qualm about buying someone's shoe, in which their feetsies have sweat and stunk, but then I remembered *my* shoes and stinky feet and I said "Ahdahellwiddit." =o)

Drea of Oz: As long as the people aren't seriously hurt, i think that there is not a damned thing wrong with laughing at people trip. Their expressions are often priceless, yet I would a fiver to see them make the face again. It reminds me of a time, once, when a friend and I were playing golf. We were in our mid-20s and we were up on the green--flat green--and, all of a sudden, Craig kinda stumbled backwards and fell on his ass. I couldn't help it. I *had* to laugh. "Craig, man!" I said. "*Babies* fall! Not grown-ups!" Tears were in my eyes. He got up, his eyebrows furrowed in irritation. he dusted off his ass. "It's the blood pressure medication I'm on, dickhead," he said. "It makes me dizzy." My laughter eventually dried up, but it took awhile. I mean, hell, it was funny and, also, if you can't laugh at your friends--and vice versa--who the hell *can* you laugh at?! ;-)

Yep. The shoes were one (or two) of the purchases.

Nocturnal said...

Cool shoes, I like those stompers.

Nanette said...

Do you have a Dillard's in Deeeetroit? If you do...I'll let you in on a secret--you can get clothing/shoes/housewares for better than thrift store prices at the end of the season, which is pretty much any time now(store season anyway). Roughly 82.5% off or better (the take 30% off 4.99 racks) Watch the paper for the ad. Now....shhhh! Oh, and watch your step! ;)

Oestre-Bunny said...

I love thrift shops. Especially the ones in the better part of town. I got a really cool Keep on Trucking belt for a fiver. I love it.

Terry said...

There is something both humorous and appropriate that the mens and toys section are located in the same room. :)
And, yea, I'm iffy on the other peoples shoes thing.

yet said...


Jay said...

Thrift stores can be so frustrating. I can go to one 10 times before I find anything of use. But, the one time I do hit the store on the right day I will find a butt-load of stuff. Shirts, shoes, pants, shorts, maybe even an electronic item. It totally makes up for the 10 empty trips.

Goodwill is always a great place to shop. Even if you do have to run the bum gauntlet to get into the building.

The One and Only A said...

Thanks, Nocturnal. They're pretty comfortable, too. I just walked my pit bull killah, and it felt like I was walking on clouds. Maybe I'm dead. :-O

Dillard's, Nighthawk? I'll look it up. Thanks.

Terry: That's the same thing I was thinking...just what the hell are they trying to say?! ;-)

Jay of Cynacism: I hear ya on the frustration factor. But, hell, it worked out pretty well for me on my first excursion there. Beginner's luck? Maybe. "Bum gauntlet" LOL

Tirzah said...

Oh I love me some thrif store shopping, but I have to be in the mood to hunt. Ususally I only shop for the kids cuz I can never seem to find anything for myself. Sweet shoes too! :)

The One and Only A said...

Hi Tizrah! Welcome! And thanks for the kind words about the zapatos. I've worn them often, actually. And I plan to go back to the store soon. Good gettin' there.

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