KING LOUIE

A Poem:

your ashes rest right next to the television set

below, Oliver snorts his breaths on a double-bed

how long could I have waited?

i fear that i waited too long, you were all skinny

gangly

well, you were gangly as a puppy, too

all big-eared and big-headed and full of energy

i remember taking you roller-blading, but

you took me

long legs flexing, you carried me Home

Home is Love

Home is Peace

Happiness is Home

brindle, you were

and are, always in my mind

you're ashes now,

gray, in a plastic bag

but, to me, you'll always be brindled

Golden Louie

Time has a way of diminishing

you were never diminished

Time has a way of culling defeat from victory

you were defeated only once

Time has a way of shellacking over past Glory

your Glory never left you

you were Strong

until your last day, you were strong

does it seem stoopid to poime to a doggy?

not to me, it doesn't

you were my Constant,

you were my Louie

and you'll always be

dogs have a way of implanting themselves into a human brain

a human mind

a human soul

dogs have a way of ingratiating themselves into a human Life

and, so, when the dog is gone

the presence is still felt

and leaves oh-so slowly

dogs are kids and babies and companions and

compatriots

dogs are Love and Health and Compassion and

grief

dogs are life-savers

dogs are saints

doG is God spelled backwards

dogs are:

feeling the wind in your face as you are pulled on 'Blades

behind a boxer-mix who thinks he's a huskey

dogs are Safety

dogs are always there

dogs are 24/7

dogs will come when called

sometimes, dogs are "bad"

getting in the garbage

treating the basement like a toilet

snapping at contractors

but dogs are oh-so good

dogs are dogs

end of story

but it ain't

when i saw you suffering, Louie,

i waited for a reason

"he's lost weight!"

"he's all skin and bones!"

"he sometimes loses his bladder in the house!"

(which, of course, you'd--on one hand--done before)
"he's not looking too well!"

"but he still eats!"

"long live the Survivor!"

even Survivors have to succumb, eventually

your last week, i kept my eye on you

i watched: for differences, for malaise towards food and drink

eventually, it came

and i knew i had to make your decision for you

because you wouldn't

you'd have shrunk to nothing

your Survivor Spirit

was nothing less than amazing

it had to be done

it had to be done.

so i did it

and cried like a baby when you were shuffled off to buffalo

when, through injection, your heart quit

when, throughout it all,

i still remembered you as the gangly puppy

all ears

and the strong boy

all Heart

and the Constant Companion, always

always.

before that point in my life, i'd never shaken with Grief

(every day is an adventure, eh?)

i shook with Grief

i kissed you on your dead head and your dead ears and

smelled, one more time, what i could of you

(the olfactory sense is too-often overlooked)

and then i realized, through the help of meeg, that

it was time to go

i realized that it was time to leave you....

but i never will; you know that, right?

one last thing:

you know how, when you were sick, you still licked ollie's ears?

that, to me, was a denotation of what you were

ollie, the trouble-maker, ollie the oaf

you, in your sickness, were there for him

i saw it in your eyes, man

whenever i would get a little mean with ollie

your ears went back

you'd protect a brother over a pack leader

that meant a lot to me

(could i be personifying?)

(when don't i?)

maybe i am over-emotional

or maybe i am not

the bond that exists between a "master" and his "beast" is strong

i'll never forget, lou

never forget

***

love you, man

have fun at that self-proclaimed "rainbow bridge"

i'll see you when i see you

i'll see you on the Other Side

baby doggy

i love you, man

and i always will